When it rains, it pours on Friday the 13th

Oy vey! Ok, now I have to stop talking about the team’s injuries. The past three or so times when I talked about injuries or boasted about the team’s playoff chances, it seems as if there is yet another injury/setback. Now, it appears as if Chris Carpenter’s return is up in the air. COME ON! Carpenter was supposed to be the team’s big gun, the secret weapon, the ace in the hole come August, but now, it seems like Matt Clement, who hasn’t pitched since mid 2006 will have to be the best we can do, reinforcement wise after Wainwright comes back, seeing as how Carpenter’s status is unknown until he gets a second opinion and Mark Mulder, is, well, Mark Mulder.

After the Ph**cking Phillies pounded the snot out of the Redbirds, which turned out to be their biggest road win since 1930 at Cincinnati, every Cardinal fan thought that nothing worse could go wrong, especially after one of the best surprises of the season so far (Todd Wellemeyer) had an awful outing. A sign that your team played an awful game: the only Cardinal “pitcher” who didn’t give up a run was 5’8 Aaron friggin’ Miles. Aaron Miles, people. For those of you who don’t know, Miles is a weak-armed second basemen who Tony throws out at SS or even third base every now and then. Not only did he pitch decently, reaching the high 70’s on the gun, but he retired the heart of the Phillie order. Well, if Clement doesn’t turn out well, it looks like Miles can step in during the pennant race and become an ace. Yeah, it will happen. And the Cubs will win the World Series this year.

But seriously folks, after a cup of coffee for both Mark Worrell (no, not related to Todd) and “Joey Bombs” Mather, it appears that the team has decided to go with some more “seasoned” players, to say the least, in Jason “what the hell does self-confidence mean?” Isringhausen and Anthony “the coaching staff hates me” Reyes. Izzy is returning from a rehab assignment, after recovering from punching a TV. set in the clubhouse (a.k.a. loss of self-confidence), while it appears as if Reyes will be auditioning for a midseason trade.

Over the past few years, Reyes’ name has been mentioned in trade discussion after trade discussion, his name even coming up once in a trade for Michael “WTF is batting average?” Bourn. It has been known for some time now that GM John Mozeliak’s asking price has been way too high, asking for an upper-echelon prospect and mid-level prospect in return for Reyes. Hey, why not? He once was a top prospect in the Cardinals system, but faltered greatly after having “artistic differences” with pitching Coach Dave Duncan. Ever since the Haren/Barton-Mulder trade, every Cardinal fan is afraid to be swindled yet again. Everyone knows what Reyes is capable of, after this game and Game 1 of the 2006 World Series. So even though both LaRussa and Duncan are opposed to him, Reyes still will be showcased, and hopefully Mozeliak will be able to find a trade partner who sees his true potential/is dumb enough to give up what Mo is asking for (I’m looking at you, Brian Sabean & Pat Gillick).

The Isringhausen case is very interesting, because, like Brewers closer Eric Gagne, he suffers from a blown psyche. Both are former all-stars, and got off to great starts, despite blowing saves left and right, Gagne more so than Izzy. Isringhausen should be able to be fixed, but Gagne on the other hand, has a history of steroids, being named in the Mitchell Report, so it is unknown whether or not he will be able to revert to his former glory of 2002-2003. Isringhausen, meanwhile, is just old, and may be on the downside of his career. LaRussa has said that he plans to ease him into the closers role, using him in middle relief at first. The same goes for Reyes: middle relief and spot start duty seem to be in his near Cardinal future. The question is, though: Izzy ready?